Men do not like to talk about it; Not your partners. But the loss of libido in men or inhibited sexual desire emphasizes a marriage more than any other sexual dysfunction, according to Barry McCarthy, co-author to rekindle the desire: a step-by-step program to help the weddings of low-sex and No sex.
Losing interest in sex may not be so common an occurrence for men as it is for women: it affects about 15% to 16% of men, and at least many women. "But when men lose interest in sex, it scares them more than women - their masculinity is so attached to their sexuality that is very threatening," says Esther Perel, a therapist of couples in New York and mating author in captivity . / p>
Loss of libido also makes men more unhappy with the rest of their lives than women. Only 23% of men with loss of libido say they still feel very happy with life in general vs. 46% of women, says Edward Laumann, a sociology professor at the University of Chicago co-author of the social organization of sexuality: sexual practices in the United States. "Men's more men."
But the loss of libido is not something you have to live. There are so much you can do to regain your sexual desire and your happy vision of life.
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libido loss does not usually happen - it's not like picking up a cold where you wake up until one morning and whoops, there it is. It can be a gradual process. Although difficult to define precisely, Laumann measures as follows: "It is a lack of interest in sex for several months last year."
The frequency of sexual activity is not the best measure of sexual interest - so many circumstances can disrupt a meeting, even if the desire is there. But if you are in a compromised relationship and have sex less frequently than the norm - about once a week - you may wonder if you are happy with things as they are.
If you are not happy about your loss of libido, researchers agree that it is better to fight these issues before entrenched. To help you identify the advance warning signals, see if you answer the following true or false questions:
"If you answered many or most of these issues, you may be on the way to losing sexual desire," writes McCarthy. Understanding the various causes is the first step in finding the appropriate resolution.
impotence dysfunction, or Ed, erectile, it's not the same as the loss of libido, but when you try one, sooner or later, it's likely that you feel the other too. "Only 7% of young people report being unable to maintain an erection," says Laumann. Although Ed increases with age: "It is 12% to 40 years, 18% for ages from 50 to 59 years; and then a sharp increase aged 60 to 25% to 30%," says Laumann.
Good news: Depending on the cause, "drugs can help this," says Laumann. Vasodilators, such as Viagra, Cialis and Levitra, improve blood flow to the penis. It also helps you understand that it is normal for erections to come during love - "can happen two to five times in a 45-minute sexual session," says McCarthy.
Men report two major problems - anxiety about performance and climax very early, according to Laumann. Almost one in three men report premature ejaculation, while under one in five are worried about performance, according to Laumann.
and anxiety do not stop there. Many modern, loving and conscientious husbands feel that they have not been truly "realized" unless their climax partners during sex as well. And since Laumann's statistics show, only 26% of women report that they always experience orgasm during sex compared to 75% of men. It is no wonder that men feel pressure - and execution under pressure can cause loss of libido.
Work stress and self-esteem too They are great factors. "If a man's performance at work is challenged, and he does not feel that he is managing himself or does not feel self-esteem, he often numb sexually," says Perel, "desire is a healthy way of law - when You do not feel deserving, you hung up. " A variety of medical problems and chronic physical conditions can decrease a man's sexual desire. Serious diseases such as cancer and depression can certainly dampen any thought of sex. Cardiovascular disease, hypertension and diabetes can reduce blood flow to the body, including genitals, adjointing havoc on libido as well. Chronic alcoholism and even occasional excessive alcohol consumption are notorious to ignite desire, but preventing performance. Conditions such as thyroid disorders and pituitary gland tumors (which controls the highest hormone production, including sex hormones) can also decrease libido. The drug class of depression called Ssris can inhibit desire. So can reassures and blood pressure medicines. Illicit substances such as heroin, cocaine and marijuana, when used strongly and chronically, can also cause loss of libido. On the positive side, when you talk to your doctor about these issues, there are alternative drugs for depression and other conditions that can have a lower impact on sexual desire. are not just women who respond - with Sexity or sexuality inhibited - how happy they are in their relationship. Sex problems can - but not always - signal other problems in the relationship that need to be addressed. Anger and disappointment often carry to the room. The paradox of modern relationships is that Greater intimacy can not do for better sex. "Sometimes a lot of proximity suffocates the desire; fire needs air," says Perel. . "Separation is a precondition for the connection. When intimacy goes into a fusion, it is not lack of proximity, but very close proximity that prevents desire." For some men, the love and respect that they have for their partners - especially after the birth of a baby - can become an obstacle to sexual desire. "Many men find it difficult to eroticize their children's mother. It seems very regressive, very incestuous," says Perel. And of course, if they are pulling their weight in a baby's care or small children, the resulting exhaustion can SAP libido for men as surely as for women. Even where children are not involved, perel reports that some men say things like: "I can not do this to my wife." Your advice? First, sleep a little. In the second, you never know until you try. The advice here is not much about getting more, but improving. The frequency is not the only measure of libido. Feelings also count. If you are looking forward to sex, and feel good about it before, during, and then, this is the true measure of if your libido is healthy. See how to help fight libido loss. "When you have no desire you feel frozen. The juice is not flowing - then the movement is important, figuratively, in addition to literally," says Perel. "Make people loose." Take a sport, go walking, with or without your partner. If you already walk or run or exercise, try to challenge yourself just a little further, then you feel a sense of accomplishment and vitality. That physical trust will transport sexual trust. can remove the pressure anxiety pressure to have in Mind that not every sexual encounter has to be perfect. Probably only about 40% to 50% of sexual events can be mutually satisfactory, McCarthy writes in your book. If you laugh at times when things do not work right, your partner will be more likely to want to try the next time, since it takes some pressure and guilt of them as well. yes, exploring your fantasies now It is considered by marriage therapists as a good thing. If you want your partner to share joy, you may want to explore some more of the newest erotic literatures and films that include feminine fantasies as well as male. After sharing yours, ask your partner about your fantasies. If they say they have none, do not stop there. Instead, ask them to name only one thing that they never wanted a man would do to give pleasure (that's a fantasy, but they may not call it). , the idea of sex being totally Spontaneous - No planning, just the heat of the moment - sounds excellent. But for anyone with jobs, family and real lives, there may not be enough hours in the day to wait for the inclination to emerge. Instead, plan to plan an opportunity to build anticipation, the way you are eager to go to a basketball game. Take pleasure in details - Get your partner a small gift, place your favorite college days music, turn off the phones and hire a nanny to take the kids into a long movie, then there will be no interruptions. For men, sexuality tends to be focused disproportionately in the genitals. Concentrating on other erogenous zones can relieve performance pressure - and add a new pleasure. When sexual satisfaction is worried, the smallest distance between two points - of excitement to orgasm - it is not necessarily a straight line for the genitals. Take deviations along the whole body, for you and your partner. Be pleasure oriented, not targeted for the goal. Tease and touch and take your time. t alking is difficult at best, but even more difficult if you are avoiding sex together and tension is high. So if you can not speak, take one of the dozens of excellent sex books out there and point to a chapter. Cozy and read together. Look at the photos, laugh - and let your partner know that you are open to improve things between you. 7. skirt with friends together Desire feeds on novelty. When you go out for dinner with other people, you have the chance to see your partner in a fresh light. You remember how interesting and exciting - and they also see you shine too. You remember why you were attracted to each other in the first place. When you have an electric problem, you call an electrician, right? Sex and marital experts can be so useful when it comes to loss of libido, then overcomes your resistance to ask for instructions and call one. Check with your doctor or urologist discard any medical conditions that may be playing a play. If you are taking medication, as an antidepressant, this may be causing loss of libido, discuss alternatives with your doctor. Male Desire Disorder: Dr. Albaugh (Sexual Disorder) - Best Weight Loss Diet Men
